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We got Smokey in 1998 from a family who were keeping him in a shed. They had gotten a puppy and it was playing too rough with the rabbit, so unfortunately Smokey was confined to the shed for his own safety. We offered to take him and give him all the love and attention he needed.

We already had another houserabbit called Missy, and after we got Smokey neutered, we gradually introduced them. For Smokey, it was love at first sight! He adored Missy and they did everything together. Missy was a 'queen bun' and wouldn't stand for any of his nonsense, she very rarely deemed him worthy enough to be groomed.

For a couple of years, life rolled along nicely and Smokey worshipped the ground Missy hopped on. They enjoyed each other's company and would lie under the table in the kitchen or lie on the back step basking in the sun, generally 'dossing about' together. They seemed not to need human company, just each other.

When Smokey was three, we discovered Missy had severe dental problems which were untreatable. In her last few hours, he wanted to be with her constantly and if I was nursing Missy on my lap, he wanted up too. During one of these 'lap cuddles' he mis-judged his jump and fell awkwardly back onto the floor, landing on the side of his face. After he fell, I knew something was wrong. He started acting strangely and wouldn't let me near him. We took him to the vet and this is when we discovered he had problems with his cheek teeth which would, as we found out, affect him for the rest of his life.

Missy unfortunately died, I was heartbroken. What I didn't realise at the time, was Smokey was heartbroken too. I tried to comfort him but nothing seemed to work, he wanted nothing to do with me or anyone else, he would just sit under the kitchen table ignoring everything and I would sit on the chair talking gently to him and generally keeping him company. We bought him a tiny dog bed and put it under the table for him to lie in, he spent many hours in it. A couple of weeks later, Smokey must have decided he wanted company and for the first time, without prompting, he jumped up onto my lap. I was delighted to say the least. From that day on, he bonded with me and was frequently by my side in the house.

When I sat on the couch, he would jump up on my knee and we'd watch telly together, he'd come up to the bedroom and play while I was getting showered and dressed, he'd come out with me when I went into the garden, but when he'd had enough, he'd go and sit beside the radiator in his room. I think he had a 'thing' about his radiator, he would lie facing it and, if it was on, he would lick it..... for ages! Smokey loved warmth and would lie on the carpet and shift around, following the sun as it shone through the window onto the carpet. He also liked to lie in front of the fire when it was on:

Through all this time, Smokey made regular trips to the vet to get spurs trimmed off his cheek teeth. He had various other health problems too including 'sludgy bladder', and conjunctivitis, but he still remained loving and trusting, and generous with his kisses.

One of his most endearing traits was he'd often lay his chin in my cupped hand and close his eyes to get his nose and head stroked, then he would reward me with kisses all over my hand and up my arm. He was so gentle.

Smokey also loved his toys and would play with them quite often. His favourites were plastic keys on a ring, a wooden spoon, toilet roll inner tubes stuffed with hay, his slinky, and bits of paper which he'd wave about like a flag.

He loved a good massage and while I sat with my feet up and watched the telly, he would lie on my legs and melt into a fur puddle enjoying every minute of the massage, so much so we had to turn the volume up on the telly cos we couldn't hear it for his groaning and snoring!

Then we got Daisy. We were told Daisy was a girl, but Smokey knew otherwise! He didn't like him at all. We tried introducing them gradually but that didn't work, Smokey always tried to beat him up (poor wee thing!), so we gave up on that and they slept in separate parts of the house. Daisy was never allowed in Smokey's room (although he did sneak in once or twice!) and Smokey was never allowed into Daisy's hutch either, usually he would visit Daisy and they would grumble at each other through the bars, but more often or not they just ignored each other.

Smokey was never shut in his hutch at all, he had free run of his room at all times. He was a very very clean rabbit, he never did the toilet in his hutch, he had a litter tray in his room and he always used it. In fact he was really quite house-proud and when I cleaned out his cage, he had to rearrange it to suit himself!

Eventually I didn't bother putting sawdust in his hutch, it wasn't needed. I just filled it with hay in the vain hope that he would nibble at it when he was hungry, but he didn't do that very often. This was a catch 22 situation, because he wouldn't eat hay, the spurs on his back teeth would grow, and because the spurs grew, he couldn't eat hay! He had to visit the vet just about every 6 to 8 weeks to have the spurs taken off.

For a change of scenery, we all used to go and spend weekends up at our holiday cottage, leaving on the Friday and coming back on the Sunday night. Daisy was fine with travelling but Smokey absolutely HATED it, if he could have vomited, I'm sure he would have!

We tried everything to make it more comfortable for him, but nothing seemed to help. Once he arrived at our destination though, he loved pinging about all over the house and out into the garden whenever he wanted (it was extremely bunny-friendly!). This is where they first bonded. He and Daisy had a ball there together. Smokey could binky for Britain! He was an expert at this, and a joy to watch!

But, as soon as we were back home again, they didn't like each other! That is, until Daisy had a stroke.

We had to nurse Daisy on our knee in the early stages of his recovery, to get him to eat and drink. Smokey was usually out and about during this time and he often wanted to get up beside Daisy to see what was going on. At first I didn't want to risk a fight on my lap as Daisy obviously couldn't cope with that. But we did pull the foot stool over so Smokey could observe from there. This progressed to him sitting on the arm of the chair and sniffing at Daisy. I tried to stop him climbing on my lap but eventually he got his own way. Smokey, from then on, was involved in looking after Daisy. They lay together and groomed each other and ultimately became very close.

Then slowly Smokey's habits changed. It started by him weeing everywhere which wasn't like him, then he progressed to having a messy bum, becoming very lethargic and not really interested in anything. I took him to the vet and he gave him a 'cocktail' injection to encourage him to eat and boost his energy. Unfortunately it contained 'testosterone' as well! So, to save Daisy from Smokey's amorous intentions, we had to keep a very close eye on them and they spent less time together. This was the beginning of Smokey's decline.

We had been at work one day, accompanied by Daisy as usual, but when we came home, I just knew something was wrong with Smokey. My mum had been in the house with him all day, and she said he'd been quiet but fine otherwise. I wasn't happy so I took him off to the vet. By the time we got to the surgery, his condition had worsened, his breathing was becoming laboured.

Jim was working that evening, so I stayed in the living room with Smokey and Daisy. Just keeping an eye on them. Smokey had gone into hiding under the couch, so after a wee while, I tried to tempt him out with something to eat, but that didn't work. I had to move the couch and pick him up. It was then I realised he was dying, he couldn't move, he didn't have the energy. I felt so guilty, I should have looked sooner.

I got a big soft towel, wrapped him up, sat on the couch and held him in my arms, making sure he was comfortable and warm. As I held him, I told him he was a good boy, my brown-eyed boy, that I loved him very much, and that everything was going to be ok. I told him that if it was his time to go, not to be afraid and to look for Missy, she would come and get him. All this time, I didn't cry, I didn't feel like crying, I just felt peaceful which I hope Smokey picked up on.

He would lie in my arms with a faraway look in his eyes, every now and then, he would 'come to' and look into my face, I'd smile at him and tell him he was so handsome, all the while knowing that he wouldn't make it through the night.

All I could do was hold him and wait. There was no point in getting a vet to come to the house. He was going to die and didn't need any more poking or prodding. I held him for endless peaceful hours until finally he looked at me for the last time, his eyes were bright and alert this time, his nose was twitching again and his legs started making small running movements. He then took four quick short breaths and disappeared from my life forever. He was gone. Ma wee boy was gone............then I cried, I broke my heart, I have never known such pain.

I really believe Missy came for him, that was why he became bright and alert, he was aware that she was there and he ran to meet her. I have never experienced anything like that in my life, and I feel truly honoured to have been with him, to have held him, in his last hours. I would give anything to have him back again, to see him grunt and growl at Jim, to hear him groaning and snoring when he was on my lap, to have him pinch things off my plate at tea time, to watch him play with his toys.

I have found this extremely difficult to write and it has taken me a long time to finish it. However, at last I have and I now have a place where I can come and remind myself of Smokey's charms, his funny ways, and how he used to thump in the middle of the night until I had to get out of bed, go downstairs and remove the spider/daddy-long-legs/fly which had startled him! Memories have a tendency to fade through time, and I had to get this done to capture a 'Smokey time capsule', before I become too busy or distracted to remember all the details.

This portrait of Smokey on his favourite chair, was given to me for my birthday. It was commissioned by my Jim and painted by a talented local artist Steven Patrick Sim. More of his work can be seen here http://www.petportraits.co.uk/

"You were my 'gentlebun'. I will always love you wee man, and I will try never to forget you. You changed my life and helped me to make life better for other buns. I miss you more than you will ever know. 'Til we meet again, I'll just have to wait, but I know you will be there to greet me. Night-night and be good, see you in my dreams"